Presented at the home of a six-year-old girl and her mother experiencing the trauma of stalking and night visits from estranged husband and abusive father;
The child was having nightmares, bed-wetting, hiding behind the lounge whenever a car drove past slowly, acting out anger and abuse towards mum and her dolls;
Mum suffered with some physical issues the result of DFV physical abuse, experienced times of extreme anxiety, panic, and depression. Mum also self-medicated with alcohol and marijuana.
Support systems were non-existent.
I worked with mother and child separately and together teaching techniques to reduce stress, dissolve fear-based thinking, and dissolve the emotional content from past trauma. They learnt to use relaxation techniques, cognitive reframing, and Emotional Freedom Techniques with ease and success.
In addition, I connected the family with a more responsive General Practitioner, a Community Social Worker, and QPS Child Protection Unit.
Initially the mother reported a significant reduction in anxiety and panic feeling more relaxed and less need for self-medication. Over a period of six visits to the home, the mother reported (for herself and her daughter) sleeping thought the night. The bed-wetting had ceased, and daughter’s tantrums had reduced significantly but had not completely stopped.
During one session, the young girl went from screaming and hiding behind the lounge in response to a car travelling past the house, to playing openly on the lounge room floor as if nothing had happened.
Six months follow up showed improved behaviour with some bouts of frustration between mother and daughter – expected for the relationship dynamics and history.
School environment where a 12-year-old male referred by school Guidance Officer for anger management, victim of bullying, defiant behaviour in class, diagnosis of ADHD, Asperger’s disorder, and poor physical health.
The boy presented relaxed and compliant, before the GO, the school Chaplain, the school Nurse, and a stranger – myself.
Ignoring the onlookers, he focused on me and I introduced myself as someone who works with children and older kids.
I told him I wanted to teach him something. I then wanted him to take this home and play with it, and to come back the following week and tell me how he went playing. I had his attention and he was ready and willing.
I asked him to think about something that made him angry. Immediately he tensed and it was obvious something else had his attention from within. Asked how big this felt using my hands as a SUDS indicator, he told me it was bigger than I could spread my hands.
I took him through two rounds of Emotional Freedom Techniques and he had a smile. Not sure if he was playing at something or if he was genuine, I asked what he was thinking about. He replied, “Nothing!” asked again he gave the same reply. I asked if he remembered what he was thinking about three minutes before and he replied yes. Asked if he was still angry, he replied, “No!”
He then asked if I wanted to know what he was thinking about and proceeded to tell me how he had a toe cut off by another boy in a fight when he was seven. What was more traumatising for him was the fact that he was the one in trouble for fighting. This he could not understand and had been very angry as a result.
He returned next week with his mother to report how he had been much calmer and he had used the technique to clear away his fear of the dark. Never having slept in the dark since a child he was now sleeping without the lights on and he could go outside in the dark by himself.
Two weeks later, I visited the home and spoke with dad who reported how his son was using the same technique to dissolve his anger when they were in conflict. The situation had changed with dad from what used to be a weeklong battle following a conflict, to an hour or so.
Thirteen-year-old male presents with anger issues. His parents had taken him to other practitioners and tried medications to no avail. They had tried a boxing bag and anger management techniques still with no significant benefits.
We had three sessions where we cleared some old core beliefs and I taught him some basic techniques for dissolving the purpose of his anger.
He presented for his fourth session and reported the ‘rage’ had gone away. When I asked him what he had done to change the situation, the answer was simple, “Ahh, Duno!”
I asked if he continued to get angry. Answer was “Yes!” Asked what he did when he noticed getting angry, he replied with a “Don’t know what you call it.” Asked what he actually did he told me how he put his roots into the ground. “Grounding” I said and he smiled with a That’s it!” “And that is all you do?” “Yep!”